It's my fault - Phan
by awesomesockesONESHOTS
Summary: PHAN ONESHOT! Contains: Fluff, chronic illness. Dan suffers from really bad epilepsy and the fans doesn't know until he gets a fit at Summer in the City. danisnotonfire, AmazingPhil, Phan


"_Could you write a fic where Dan has epilepsy (not photosensitive) and the fans don't know and he has medication to control it and stuff but he and Phil go to Summer in the City and Dan got drunk the night before so the pills don't take effect because he still has alcohol in his bloodstream in the morning. He has a fit in the middle of the M&G and ends up going to hospital?"_

Someone asked for this^^ Of course. Here we go! (I've been waiting for an epilepsy prompt. Thank you!)

**A/N:** Maybe I changed the prompt slightly because I know everything about epilepsy now after three hours of research.

**Contains: **Fluff, chronic illness.

**Phan status: **Together

**Words: **6.606(idk what happened)

**POV: **Point of view changes through the story.

_**It's my fault**_

* * *

**DAN'S POV!**

"Remember your pills!" Phil yelled from his room.

"_Yes_," I answered in a low voice followed by a sigh. Phil wouldn't be able to hear my answer. I picked up the bottle on the counter and opened it before I took out at pill and swallowed it along with some water.

I immediately let go of everything I was holding and hid my head in my hands when a sudden wave of nausea hit me. My breathing turned heavy, I started to sweat, and my muscles wouldn't cope so I fell with my elbows down on the counter top, hitting the glass of water and sending it to the floor where in broke into a hundred pieces. I felt too dizzy to stand, so I sat down on the wet floor.

"What happened?" Phil asked, but it was hard to hear or see him. Before I knew what was going on, Phil had knelt down in front of me, looking concerned.

After a few seconds the nausea slowly faded away and my body started to relax again.

"You okay?" Phil asked, looking down my arms to see if I had cut myself on the glass.

I shook my head in response and took some deep breaths. My arms had locked themselves across my chest and it took a few more seconds before I was able to move them away. My breathing turned fast and I started to shake a bit. This was the worst part. I couldn't help but get terrified after each attack like this, which of course was understandable. It was hard to explain how it felt like. It was like everything stopped and I lost all control.

Phil sat fully down on the floor opposite me, gently touching my knee and trying to calm me down.

"It's okay. You're okay, Dan," he said quietly as he kept watching me. With unsteady movements, I nodded in his direction.

Phil had a unique way of handling this and he surprised me every time. I knew it scared him a lot, but he always stayed calm. He didn't show how scared he was and I loved that. That gave me a better opportunity to relax because I didn't have to think about Phil freaking out too.

"How bad was it?" he asked after a moment of silence, locking his gaze with mine.

"S-si-six.." I slurred. It was a little hard to pronounce the words.

Phil sighed soft before he spoke, "Let me help you up." I nodded again and forced my arms away from my body so that Phil could pull me up off the floor.

"Maybe we should stay home," he said worriedly, gently brushing my hair out of my eyes as we stood up.

"No. I really want to go," I answered.

"Dan. It's the second one today. I think we should stay."

"It won't happen again," I assured. Unsteadily, I grabbed another glass, turned on the tap, and got some more water to drink.

"You don't know that, Dan. Today doesn't seem like a good day to go out."

"It's just a small party. I'll be fine—promise. Now move so I can clean the floor," I said, trying to change the subject. When it came to my epilepsy, Phil was even more nervous than I was. It was kind of sweet because it showed that he really cared and didn't want me to get hurt, but sometimes it was just annoying. He didn't want me to be alone for longer than necessary—he had even removed the lock to the bathroom—and he constantly asked if I was okay.

My epilepsy was really bad. The medication I was given helped a little, but it still couldn't prevent me from having seizures. We went to the doctors a lot to try out different kinds of medication, but it was hard finding something that worked perfectly.

"Go take a break and sit on the couch for a minute. I'll clean this," Phil said and took a step closer to get a proper look at me. "How much did you sleep last night?" he asked, looking me over carefully.

"A couple of hours. Maybe five. Why?" But I knew why. Lack of sleep was one of the things that made it worse. I just didn't want to bring it up because I wanted everything to be normal.

"Go take a nap." Phil placed a hand on each of my shoulders and lowered his head a bit, trying to make his point as clear as possible.

"What? No! We'll miss the party," I protested. Phil really didn't want us to go to this YouTube party. I guess he was scared something would happen to me after I'd had a bad day like this. But Summer in the City was happening and everyone was going. I didn't want to miss out.

"Dan..."

"Phil."

Phil sighed deeply before he spoke. "I really can't convince you to stay home, can I?" He looked a bit disappointed and hurt, but I wouldn't let a stupid, annoying illness stop me from doing the things I wanted to do.

"No," I answered shortly, trying to look innocent.

"Fine…" Phil groaned and pushed me out of the way. I opened my mouth slightly to give a response, but decided not to and walked to the lounge instead. I knew Phil only did it because he cared so much, but I just wanted to live a normal life and not think about it all the time.

I lazily lay down on the soft pillows. I always got a little tired after a seizure, so I decided to watch a TV show while Phil did whatever he was doing.

My eyelids grew heavier as each second went by. I tried to stay awake, but eventually had to give up and fell into a deep sleep.

**PHIL'S POV! **

"Do you want to write the seizure down in the book, or should I?" I asked as I threw the pieces of broken glass into the bin. "Dan?" No answer.

"Dan?" My heartbeat rose a tiny bit. It always did whenever Dan didn't answer me.

I nervously walked into the lounge, holding the book in which he was meant to write about each of his seizures so we could keep track on them, just to find Dan passed out asleep on the couch. I let out a small sigh of relief. Even though I knew I shouldn't worry that much, I did. I couldn't help it. I loved Dan too much to see him get hurt or feel bad, but sometimes it seemed like I was the only one in this house who took this seriously.

That was a lie. Dan did take it seriously, and I knew this was hard on him because it prevented him from doing certain things. I knew he hated it more than everything else.

But now I had two options. I could either not wake him up so that he could get the sleep he obviously needed and let him be angry with me, or I could wake him up in a few hours and go to the party he really wanted not to miss.

I walked back to my room, picked up his duvet, and walked into the lounge again to wrap it around him. He drowsy grabbed the corner of his cover and slowly rolled around beneath it without waking up. I couldn't help but smile a little. He looked really cute when he slept. I decided to stay for a moment, making sure he would be comfortable enough before I got back to editing my video.

But he didn't seem to wake up any time soon, so I turned off the TV and walked out, closing the door behind.

* * *

"Dan." I carefully pulled his duvet down, revealing his messy hair. "Time to wake up," I said in a low, husky voice.

"Hmm..." he responded without moving.

"You've been asleep for over two hours," I kept whispering. It was like the puzzle got solved in his brain and he quickly opened his eyes and looked around the room, disoriented, before his eyes fell back on me.

"Wait, what?" he asked.

"You fell asleep." I smiled. I knew he would be a little confused when he woke up, but it would be worse if he didn't wake up by himself.

"Why?"

"You had a seizure," I reminded as I sat down on the couch right next to him.

"Oh... right." He nodded slowly and leaned back against the pillows. "I need to take my pills soon." He sleepily rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands.

"You already did, Dan." I removed his hands from his face to make eye contact. "Okay? You did take them already." I smiled at him.

"Yeah, okay. Okay…" He took a deep breath and looked at me, confused.

"You okay?"

"Yeah. I'm just a little, you know…" He moved one hand around his head to indicate that he was confused. I nodded at his explanation.

"Are you tired?" I asked, looking him over.

"A tiny bit." He rubbed his eyes again. "What should we do?"

"Dan."

"Hmm?"

"The party, remember?" I knew this was normal, but I always got worried each time he couldn't remember. After all those years with epilepsy and having seizures so often, it had made small changes to his memory.

"Yes, of course!" He said it like he never forgot. "Just, ehh, give me a moment..."

"Sure…" I dragged my answer a bit and stood up. "I'm going to bring you some water, okay?" He nodded slowly and I walked out.

I quickly checked the container in which we stored his mediation to make sure he did take it, but the pill was still there.

"_Dan,_" I groaned and hid my face in my palms. If he didn't take it, he was now two hours behind schedule. I looked around to make sure he hadn't taken something else or messed up in the dates. No, he just didn't take it. But if he had the seizure right after I told him to take it, he probably had been confused.

"I thought you said I took it already?" he asked as I handed him the medication and the glass of water.

"I was wrong," I smiled. I didn't want to tell him that he was too out of it to take it when I told him, but it was mostly my fault. I should have checked before.

* * *

**DAN'S POV!**

"Do you really think it is a good idea to go?" Phil asked as he tied his shoes.

"No. But we are doing it anyway. I feel okay." I really wanted to go, but I had to admit that it had been a really rough day and tomorrow we had to do a meet and greet with our fans for God knows how long. "I promise you, I'll tell you if I can," I assured him as I tied my shoes too.

"But no drinking!" Phil looked seriously at me, like he would never look away again. I knew how he felt about me drinking. I rarely drank because we didn't go out that much, so it wasn't that big of a problem. But what happened a couple of parties ago really changed Phil's mind about this whole party thing and me drinking.

"Fine," I whined. I looked away from him, but he kept looking at me. "What is it?" I snapped.

"Nothing." He shook his head quickly. "Come on. The taxi is here," he said in a slightly disappointed tone.

I leant my head back against the seat and placed my hand on the window, without really realising what I was doing. I tightened my muscles in my neck, causing my head to make small and fast movements.

"..._Dan_.."

"..._Dan_..."

"...Dan.."

"Dan!"

"What?" I asked, moving my hand from the window.

"Please tell me if it becomes too much, then we'll go home." Phil looked more nervous than ever.

"Promise." I took a few deep breaths, grabbed Phil's hand and squeezed it quickly, letting him know I was fine.

"Do you want a drink?" Chris asked. I knew I really shouldn't, but Phil was stuck somewhere with PJ. He wouldn't find out anyway.

"Yeah, thanks." I smiled and stretched out my hand to grab the bottle, but just as I was about to put my hand around it, my fingers stiffened and my arm made an involuntary move to the left, sending the bottle to the floor. My eyes were locked at the air in front of me. It was always like my brain stopped working for a couple of seconds and I was being pushed out of reality. This usually happened a few times every hour where I would just zone out for a short moment and couldn't really control what I was doing.

"Sorry," I said and placed my arm back in front of me.

"Don't think about it," Chris responded, handing me another. "Got it?" He smiled and kept holding at the top of the bottle, making sure I had it before letting go.

"Yes. Thank you." I smiled back.

"How's the epilepsy?" Chris asked, glancing around at all of the other YouTuber's around us.

"Good. It's fine," I lied. Nothing had changed since he'd last asked me about it.

"The mediation works?" He moved his gaze to me.

"Yeah." I looked to the floor, avoiding eye contact. I didn't want to be the talking subject, again. That's why I preferred lying, even though it was rude to people who actually cared and were my friends. But Phil knew everything, and that was enough. We were always together anyway, so it wouldn't be that big of a problem if something happened.

"So you're allowed to drink?"

"From who? The doctors or Phil?" I grinned and looked back up.

"Yeah, I know Phil and his 'over protecting'." He grinned back.

I thought about the situation before I spoke. "But yeah, I can drink." I knew Phil would flip at me, but I wanted to have a good time and escape from reality for some time.

"Great!" Chris' eyes lit up like Christmas lights as he turned to the bartender behind him to order some shots.

**PHIL'S POV!**

I nervously laughed along with PJ and Jack, but I didn't really pay attention to what we were talking about. I kept looking around. I had involuntarily left Dan somewhere with Chris. Chris knew about his epilepsy, but I knew Dan liked to lie about it, making it seem less serious.

"PJ." I poked his shoulder, getting his attention. "I need to find Dan."

"You don't know where he is?" he asked, surprised, as he turned around to face me. Jack did the same.

"No. We got split up when we got here a couple of hours ago. I think—and hope—that he's somewhere with Chris."

"I'm sure he's okay, Phil."

"But we don't know that, Peej," I said frustrated.

"Wait. Why is this so important?" Jack asked, smiling slightly.

"Dan has epilepsy," I answered quickly. I forgot for a moment that not everyone knew. Jack's smile faded away in less than a second.

"Oh," he replied, looking at me.

"Yeah. Sorry for not telling you, but sometimes things get a bit stressful."

"No it's fine—I understand." He nodded.

"I really gotta go find him now. I've already left him for too long." I knew it sounded stupid that I had to go look for my 22-year-old boyfriend. He should be able to keep an eye on himself. And he probably could, but I still didn't like the fact that he was somewhere I didn't know.

I walked through the crowd of intoxicated people, which was pretty hard due to the fact that everyone wanted to have a chat with me.

I spotted Dan a few meters in front of me, standing beside Chris and Dean.

"I've been looking all over the place for you!" I said, a little louder than normal because of the music. "Wait a minute…" I walked closer. "Are you drunk?" Dan unsteadily turned around to face me.

"Heey Phil! Where have you been?" Dan happily responded and threw one arm around my shoulder.

"Dan. Stop." I pushed his arm away, annoyed. I couldn't believe he drank even though I told him not to.

"What's wrong, Philip?" he slurred, about to trip over his own feet in his attempt to stand still.

"What's wrong?" I repeated angrily. "What's wrong?!" Chris and Dean had frozen in their positions. "Let me tell you what's wrong, Daniel. I only agreed to go to this stupid party if you promised not to drink. And you did it behind my back!"

"You can't tell me what to do!" Dan snapped back.

"Maybe not, but you would do well listening to me for once!" This was making me more sad than angry. "You _know_ drinking can make it worse."

"I'm just trying to live a normal life, Phil."

"But you're not normal!" I burst out without thinking. Dan's face changed. "No, I didn't mean it like that."But he quickly turned around and stormed out. "Dan!" I mentally hit myself. I knew I shouldn't have said that. I knew he just wanted to have a normal life without doctors, hospitals, and medication all the time. And I really did my best to make it happen, but some things were just stupid. Like drinking. Why didn't he just think?

"Hold up," Chris interrupted. "He told me it was better?"

"Well, that's a lie, Chris. Nothing has changed," I sighed.

"I'm so sorry."

"You didn't know," I replied, frustrated. "How much did he drink?"

"Enough," Dean answered.

"Okay. Okay, I have to go find him. Talk to you later."

I started walking quickly in the direction Dan went, only to find him leaning against the wall outside the building. He had one hand on the wall to support himself and he was bent slightly forward while he was throwing up unto the ground beneath.

I rushed through the last space between us.

"Idiot," I muttered for only myself to hear. I gently removed his hand from the wall, making him lose his balance a little. After that I carefully placed him down on the small step in front of the door so I was sure he wouldn't fall and get hurt.

"I didn't mean what I said. I'm sorry," I told him and rubbed his back while I held his head, making sure he wouldn't hit himself or me.

"I can't do this.." he quietly sobbed.

"Yes you can. I'm here to help you, Dan." I lifted his head slightly and wiped his mouth with my sleeve.

I supported his body while I tried to call a taxi for us with my other hand. I explained where we were and they said there would be a car for us shortly. I just hoped Dan was done vomiting or the cab driver would get mad.

Dan rested his head in his hands, elbows propped up on his knees.

"I'm sorry," he slurred after a moment of silence.

"Yeah, I know. But sorry doesn't help anything," I answered, trying not to sound to angry on him. That wouldn't help either.

"I know, I…"

**DAN'S POV! **

I felt bad for drinking. Not only physically, but because I didn't think the consequences through.

"Yeah, I know. But sorry doesn't help anything," Phil told me. I knew he was right—this was bad for my health in all kind of ways.

"I know, I…" I slurred, but got cut off by an unpleasant hit of nausea. I breathed heavily, trying to stop the contents of my stomach from leaving my body but failed and threw up on the ground in front of me. I heard Phil sigh deeply. He was obviously sick and tired of me right now. I wished we just had stayed home like he said, but of course, I didn't listen.

"The cab is here, Dan. Can you stand?" I nodded sleepily against my arm and tried to stand, but before I knew what was going on I felt Phil pull me from the ground and support me the rest of the way to the car. Carefully placing me into the seat, he got in beside me.

Purely on reflex I rested my head down on his shoulder. He immediately wrapped his arms around me, allowing my head to fall to his chest.

As the car journey went on all my muscles began to tighten and relax in a steady rhythm. It felt kind of like someone was shooting electricity through my body, making me hold my breath with each shot.

I squeezed my eyelids hard together. This happened sometimes before I would have a massive seizure.

Phil started rubbing his hand up and down my shoulder and pulled me a bit closer. I guess he realised what was going on, after all my whole body was pressed against his.

"Relax," he whispered and kissed the top head.

"I'm try... ing." But it was too overwhelming. I was drunk and now this started and tomorrow we had to be out meeting fans for hours. My emotions were all over the place. I started crying quietly into Phil's shirt, but it was hard because every five seconds, all my muscles would get tense.

"No. Don't cry." Phil gently pushed me away from his chest to get a better look at me and brushed my tears away. "It's okay, shh."

"No. It's n... ot," I cried and moaned because the air was being squeezed out of me.

"It will be over soon, okay?" Phil locked his eyes onto mine, just watching. "Okay? It will stop—don't worry."

I nodded nervously in response and closed my eyes, just letting the tears run down my cheeks. Phil grabbed a hold on my hand so he could follow my movements.

**PHIL'S POV!**

"Dan?" I asked when we cab pulled over in front of our apartment.

"Hm?" he answered, still with closed eyes. I could tell he was absolutely exhausted.

"We're home now. Can you walk?" I asked him and moved his fringe out of his face. He nodded drowsily against my hand. "Come on." I quickly paid the driver and got out of the car before I helped Dan out with me.

"Slowly." He walked a little unsteadily on his feet and I had to support him all the way. We had to stop a couple of times on the stairs so he could catch his balance.

"Let me help you," I offered. I pulled his shirt off above his head before I pulled down his pants too, leaving him only in his underwear on top of the bed.

"Thank you," he sniffed. When he was like this it usually meant that he would have a fit soon. He was able to feel it before it would happen. We couldn't be 100% sure it ever would happen or when, but it was likely.

"Lay on your stomach," I commanded him gently. He didn't question it and did as he was told.

I crawled on top of him with one knee on each of his sides. I started massaging his shoulders and down along his spine, making his muscles relax as much as possible.

"Just try to sleep," I whispered as I moved my hands up and down, putting light pressure on his skin.

"Hmm.." he muttered into the pillow. It wouldn't be long before he slept. I just feared for tomorrow. If we didn't show up our fans would get really disappointed and maybe angry at us. The fans didn't know about his epilepsy, but maybe it was time to tell them because I couldn't think of one good reason to leave the house tomorrow.

After 10 minutes, the only thing I could hear was light snoring. I kept moving my hands in small circles all over his back and shoulders. His body was really tense. I did this so he wouldn't be sore in the morning after he'd had small cramps like that.

After another 10 minutes I stopped and moved away from him. I stripped out of my own clothes and got into the bed beside him. I wrapped my duvet around us both and held him close.

* * *

**DAN'S POV!**

It took me a minute to understand what had happened. I opened my eyes slowly and realised I was looking straight onto Phil's chest.

I looked around, disoriented.

Then I realised what day it was. We had to stand up and look happy for hours while hugging people. I wouldn't be able to handle that. I couldn't...

My vision started to blur because of the tears in my eyes. I tried to keep quiet, not waking up Phil. But of course it was impossible, as he was lying right next to me.

"Hey, hey. What's wrong?" he asked as he moved to rest himself on his elbows.

"I ca-can't do it," I cried. Phil didn't say anything but just wrapped his arms around me the best he could and squeezed me a bit while rocking me from side to side. "I-I don't want to," I sobbed.

"Then you don't have to," he whispered back and placed a long kiss on my forehead.

"B-but the fans…"

"Tell them why. They would understand."

"No." I had thought about telling them, but for me this was something personal and none of the Internet's business.

"Dan..."

"Just g-give me a minute," I sniffed, leaning up against him. My head was pounding really badly because of the hangover I gave myself and my sobs didn't help anything.

Phil sighed deeply and rested his chin on my head.

We stayed in the bed for some time, allowing me to wake up fully and calm down.

"Should I get some breakfast?" Phil suggested, releasing me from his arms.

"Y-yes." I quickly dried my eyes with the back of my hand and swung my legs over the edge of the bed.

"Tea or coffee?" Phil asked as he opened the cupboard.

"Coffee please," I yawned.

"Sure." He smiled and turned around. "Start making the toast."

I nodded even though he couldn't see me. I picked up the bread and cut a couple of slices. My hand moved backwards and I dropped the knife on the floor. I stared blindly into the cupboard in front of me before banging my head against it.

"Sorry," I mumbled after a few seconds. All these sudden and involuntary movements were even worse in the morning.

"Don't be sorry." Phil handled me back the knife and brushed his fingers across my forehead to see if I had injured it. "It's not your fault," he smiled.

I knew it wasn't, but I still felt it necessary to apologize even though Phil told me not to every time.

"Take your pills before you do anything else," he commanded and handled me a few pills. "The others are for the headache." Phil looked away, disappointed.

I knew what I did was wrong and I truly felt bad about it. But it was impossible to change that now.

**PHIL'S POV!**

"Do you have everything?" I asked Dan as we stepped out of our front door.

"Yes." He smiled. After one hour of mood changes every 10 minutes, Dan came to the conclusion that he wanted to go and meet the fans. I didn't like the idea, but agreed against my will. I had tried to convince him otherwise, without any luck.

"Are you sure about this?" I knew I shouldn't ask because it could make him freak and change his mind again.

"Stop asking," he snapped. I shut up, sighed, and started walking towards the taxi.

It was only a short ride and we would be at the event.

"Dan?"

"Hmm?" He disorientated looked at me

"The car stopped, Daniel," I nearly whispered and glared at him.

"Oh, yeah." He seemed a little confused and absent, and I looked at him worriedly. He didn't seem to notice though.

"Follow me," I told him and he did. I led us away from the other people and into a small hallway where we were alone.

I placed both my hands on his shoulders, making him focus on me.

"Will you please tell me if it gets bad? I can see that you're a little confused and nervous right now. We know what that means, Dan. I don't like this." I tried to make my point clear.

"I'm fine." But I could tell he was lying. "It'll be okay," he assured me. But just as he said that his body went tense and then relaxed shortly after. It did that a few times and stopped completely. Making him lose his breath a little.

"Dan..."

"If we don't go now we'll be late, Phil."

I didn't answer, but just shook my head and released him before I walked out and into the big hall we were meant to do the meet up with some of the other YouTubers.

We were only an hour into the meet up when I saw Dan's movements became stiffer and non-rhythmic, and he had dropped a lot of stuff already. I tried to ignore it and put on a smile for the fans, even though I was a little concerned.

I quickly caught his eyes right before his knees bent together and he collapsed onto the floor, making all of the fans who were standing around us gasp and cover their mouths in shock.

It was like everything happened in slow motion. I ran towards him and got on my knees beside his head. All Dan's muscles went rigid and he stopped breathing. After a few seconds he began to shake violently, his body still tense. I pushed him on his side, facing away from the fans in order to keep his airway open. My hand quickly became covered in blood mixed mucus, which meant that he had bit into the cheek or tongue. It was not new for me, but the people around us seemed to freak out even more. But I didn't care about them, even though they were obviously scared and confused. I just tried to keep my mind calm and do what I always did whenever this happened.

Dan's whole body kept tightening up and relaxing violently in a regular and fast rhythm. It looked like someone was sending jolts of electricity through his entire body. He was completely unconscious and his lips were slowly turning blue because of the lack of oxygen. I didn't like this. It usually went on for 30 seconds or one minute, but he just kept shaking. I moved my eyes from Dan's face and onto my surroundings, only to reveal a lot of panicking eyes fixed on me and Dan. I understood why they were scared—I was too—but I couldn't allow myself to freak out and panic, as I was probably the only one around who knew how to handle this.

I spotted some first aid medics running up to me, but decided to do their job and call an ambulance before they got here. The seizure had been going on for too long. The dispatcher over the phone told me that the ambulance would be there as soon as possible.

"What happened?" one of the medics asked, getting down on the ground too.

"He has epilepsy," I answered shortly. "I've called an ambulance." After Dan had become completely still, he started breathing again. But only small heavy breaths. He would soon fall asleep and be impossible to wake up again.

After a moment, his muscles began to tighten and relax really slowly again, just like yesterday and earlier but just with more than 10 seconds between each cramp. He sounded like he was really struggling, so I held my hand in front of his mouth to check if he was getting air. He was still breathing—it just was being interrupted by his movements.

The first aid medics couldn't really do anything and just stood there.

I saw the medics from the ambulance come running through the crowd and carefully pushed people out of the way.

"What's his name?" they asked.

"Dan. Ehh, Daniel Howell."

They quickly checked his pulse and opened his eyes to flash a light into them to see if he was just asleep or unconscious. Normally I wouldn't call an ambulance, but this attack went on far too long to be safe so he needed to the checked through.

I answered all the questions the medics asked me the best I could and they moved him onto the stretcher. He didn't react at all.

"He bit into his cheek or something. I couldn't really see, but there is definitely blood," I told them. I nervously threw a glance in the direction of the fans and gave them a small smile to let them know everything was okay. Everyone was uncomfortably quiet.

The medic opened Dan's mouth to get a look.

"Yeah, I see," he answered me. "Let's get him out." His colleague pushed the stretcher through the building and we were being followed be a lot of confused eyes. Everyone was firing questions at me. I kept quiet and just smiled so I wouldn't seem rude.

They got him into the ambulance, and I jumped in too, sitting beside Dan.

We started driving and the medic opened Dan's mouth again, grabbing some paper towels to clean the inside of his mouth so he could get a better look at the wound.

"Is it bad?" I asked a little nervously. He'd had stitches before because of this.

"No. It's fine." He threw the paper away. "Did he fall hard? On his head or anything?"

"No. More like on his knees and side. I don't think he got hurt," I responded. The man nodded and wrote something down on his clipboard before he stuck a water gun into Dan's hand and wrapped an oxygen mask around his face, giving him some air as he'd held his breath for quite a while.

Dan looked really exhausted and he didn't move at all. We wouldn't be able to be back at Summer in the City any time soon.

We pulled over in front of the hospital and the medics rolled Dan inside. I followed.

They handed all the information I had been giving to the doctors at the hospital and Dan was quickly moved to another bed. I thanked the medics as they left.

The doctors watched his pulse too, along with some other stuff to check if everything was okay. They hooked a bag of salt water up to his IV and put another oxygen mask on him. Better to be safe than sorry, even though I thought he was okay and just really tired.

"Daniel?" One of the nurses carefully shook his shoulder, trying to get him come around. I smiled a little because I tried that last time and it took me forever.

But surprisingly enough, after only five attempts Dan opened his eyes, confused.

He quickly shut them back together and moved his head slightly to the side before he let out some whimpering noises. He was either scared, confused, or both.

I stepped closer to his bedside.

"It's okay, Dan," I assured him as I gently stroked his arm.

"Do you feel pain?" his nurse asked.

Dan nodded unsteadily and pointed at his knees.

"He fell on his knees," I pointed out. The nurse walked around the bed to pull down Dan's jeans, revealing his already slightly blue knees. She checked them quickly, but everything seemed normal.

"I-I'm just s-so tired," Dan sobbed and closed his eyes. He wasn't really crying, but everything was just too much to manage for him right now.

"I know, it's okay." I dragged my fingers through his messy hair, making him calm down a little. "When can I take him home?" I asked the nurse.

"We have to keep him under observation for a couple of hours but after that you're free to leave. You seem like one who's used to dealing with this." She smiled kindly.

"Yeah, I am. Thank you." I smiled back.

"I-I don't like this..." Dan moved around on the bed like he couldn't get comfortable. "Everything h-h-hurts.."

"I know, but it's fine. You can sleep now," I told him as I pulled his duvet around him. His whole body would be really sore after this.

"What about the event?" he sleepily sobbed.

"Don't think about that. Not at all, please. Just get some rest." I don't quite think he remembered everything that happened, but maybe that was for the best at the moment. But I knew we definitely had to tell the fans what was wrong. It was going to be with or without Dan's permission.

It didn't take him long to fall into a deep sleep. We had to stay here for a while so I decided to tell our fans what was happening. Twitter was already exploding and everyone was arguing.

I chose my words carefully, making a long Tumblr post and linking to it on Twitter, Facebook, and YouTube, explaining everything. Dan would not appreciate it at all, but that was something I would have to deal with later.

* * *

"Feeling better?" I asked, rising from the couch when Dan walked into the lounge.

"No," he muttered. But I just smiled a bit. I knew he was lying—he was obviously just still really tired. "It hurts."

"Where?"

"Everywhere..." He closed his eyes and threw his head backwards, letting out a few pathetic whines. I felt so bad for him. After a fit like that his body would be really sore for a long time.

"Let me look at you." He moved his gaze from the ceiling and my eyes travelled across his face. I sighed softly and wrapped my arms around him, holding him close.

"I'm sorry," he breathed into my neck.

"Don't be sorry. It's my fault," I responded.

"No it's not."

"It is. I know how you get before a seizure. I should have forced you to stay home." I pulled back to look him in the eyes. We both knew it would happen at some point and Dan wasn't thinking straight, which meant I had to be the brain and make decisions for him. "I am the one who takes the blame for this. And I am so, so sorry." I gave him a quick kiss on his forehead before holding him close again.

Dan didn't answer. I was the one to take full responsibility for this, and he knew it.

"How about we watch a movie?" I suggested as I released him completely. He nodded in agreement. "Stay there." I ran to our room, picked up the duvet went ran back to the lounge.

I sat back down on the couch and signalled to Dan that he should sit next to me. He did and nuzzled as close to my body as possible. His back was slightly against my chest and stomach while I had one arm around his shoulder, giving him space.

"You can sleep," I whispered into his hair, rubbing small circles on his shin with my fingertips.

"Yeah..." he answered in a low voice.

"I love you, Dan…" I kept whispering, but of course he heard it anyway and slowly turned his head.

He gently pressed his lips against mine and gave a long, caring kiss. "I love you too."

_**thend**_

* * *

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**A/N:** If you have an idea for a possible chapter two. Please let me know!


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